The English language should invent particular terms for people to use when referring to their in-laws.
"Mom" and "Dad" are obviously unfit terms for this, since one is accustomed to applying them to the most proper individuals they belong to, i.e., those people who bore you and brought you up. Using these terms to apply to adopted family members from marriage is very awkward.
However, there are only two other alternatives to using these parental terms. One is to call in-laws by their last names with the respectful "Mr." or "Mrs." in front. This is very confusing, since in the case of the lady she is being called the same thing as her mother-in-law and that makes it all very odd. Moreover, it sounds stodgy. Yuck.
The other option is to call in-laws by their first names, or some corruption thereof. This is unfitting, since it isn't customary or proper for first name usage to cross generational gaps, unless the older person is an unusually good friend or of an unusually bubbly temperament. (Neither of which can be said to apply in most cases, and most certainly not in mine - my in-laws are anything but bubbly).
So, I'm now taking suggestions for new words to fill this office. If you can, supply an etymological analysis and show why the terms are a good fit.
And no, I'm not asking you to be serious.
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5 comments:
You know, your in-laws may read this...
Be very careful.
I vote for "nearly parents" - "neoparentae" in latin.
In spanish there is the term "comadre" & "copadre"
oh good Lord.
You call them Mom and Dad, for pete's sake. It's not awkward, it's not unfitting, it's not wrong. I flatly disagree with your assertion that your biological parents are necessarily those to whom the terms mom and dad most properly belong.
Heck, I call everyone mom and dad. Everyone who has had me over for thanksgiving or Christmas has been called mom and dad. Cunninghams, Kuenstle's, Boyers, Deregos....the list goes on.
Oh, but you wanted a new word, not a rant.
hm.
well,
...(five minutes)
...ok, I give up. must get to bed.
Sorry to be as unhelpful as Tasik, but I like the idea of Mom and Dad (or whatever your spouse calls them.) It seems like part and parcel of "becoming one flesh" to take on your new parents with affection. Of course, some in-laws specifically ask for first names... in which case I would probably do like my mother does and call them thus in direct conversation, but by more respectful and familial terms to the rest of the family...
I can just hear you now... "Neopop"; "neodaddy"; "His-papa" "Mr.-Lastname-Dad"...
Well, I'll be derned.
I *have* been having a hard time with it, but I think it's because I'm so close to my own parents. It's especially in the case of "Mom", as my mother happens to be a woman I understand exceptionally well, personality-wise, and, well, let's just say there's a contrast. I'm trying to remind myself that my mother-in-law didn't have a daughter, though, and that it's really very endearing that she wants me to call her "Mom". I'm going to give it my all over Christmas.
My father-in-law has requested that I call him "Greg", while saying that I can call him "Dad" when and if that is ever comfortable.
I think you should call "father-in-law" FRED,
and "mother-in-law" SHIRLEY.
There -short, concise, and endearing.....
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